Tuesday, March 12, 2013

A BAD EXPERIENCE WHEN I BROKE MY ARM

Fernando Gonzalez
March 12, 2013
Essay #1 Draft #1 Bridge Class

A Bad Experience When I Broke My Arm
               
I still remember the day when I experienced a fall that caused my broken arm. It was a summer time, really hot and good to go to the beach. I was an 8 years old kid who likes to play everywhere without know that accidents could happen. On that day I went to school it was like any other day, that day after school I waited for my cousin who was in a different classroom. Both of us were in the same grade. We were the same age and seemed like twins. That was that everybody said in the town by that time.
On our way to our home after school my cousin and I stopped to play in a wrong place. This was a place where the water runs all around the town is kind of a small river. By that time this small river was dry and empty, so my cousin and I jump into there to hang on a tube of steel that crossed the little river.
We were having fun while we were playing on the tube, but I didn’t know that something terrible was about to happen to me when I fell from the tube to the dry river. My surprise after I fell was that I couldn’t get up by myself, I was feeling a lot of pain and I just couldn’t move my arm and I started to cry. My cousin was telling me repetitive times to get up but I can’t, we didn’t know what to do. By causality, one of my aunts was walking around there and recognizes me, she immediately went there to help me to get up and take me home.
While they were taking me home, I realize that I had hurt my harm and I notice that my arm started to change of color and became yellow like banana. My thoughts at that moment were that is something serious and I couldn’t move my arm anymore, my mood change from happy kid to sad. My mother got angry with me that day, but to the next day my mother told me that I don’t have to cry and worry about what happened because she would take me with a person who has experience and help me to cure my broken arm.
After the accident I started to experience many bad things in my life, all this was nightmares, motion sickness, vomit, and a lot of pain. They had to put me a cast for my arm and gave many treatments like some ointments, herbals and pills to help me to get better and better every day.
I was afraid to be alone since I couldn’t move my arm I couldn’t do nothing on those days of recovery. I didn’t go to school for almost two months, I had to stay at home all those days. After four weeks they remove me a cast and my mother took me with a man who was specialist on that kind of fractures, he gave me massages and helped me to be able to move my arm little by little until I was able to write again. After I recovery from the fracture I was the happiest kid on the world.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Fernando,

    This sounds like it was incredibly painful! I can't believe that your skin turned the color of bananas -- what a frightening image!

    Why was the dry river "a wrong place"? Had your parents told you not to play there? And what was the metal tube? Was it some kind of bridge? I'm trying to picture that part of your story, but I'm not sure what that structure was. Why was it there? What was it used for?

    There are two expressions that I wanted to quickly correct since they are quite useful. The first one is "by that time." I think that when you use it in this essay, you really mean "at that time." When you use "by" it means that you are talking about something that happened previous to the current story. Also, instead of "by causality" use "by coincidence." The other expression doesn't exist.

    This is nicely developed -- well done!

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    1. Yes it was painfull, i will never forget that. It was an accident that happened to me when i was 8 years old, now i can understand to the kids when they do something bad because at time kids do everything without being aware that accidents can happen everywhere.

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