Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Do you know what is strep throat?

Essay # 1 Draft # 1
03/12/2013
Nataliya Stefanyshyn

 When I was a teenager, I got strep throat (angina).This is an inflammation of the tonsils, which are oval mussels at the back of the throat, caused by bacterial infection .People can get this illness in any season of the year. I remember when I had strep throat, I had symptoms, such as sore throat and high fever. It was bad experience in my life because things got much worse later.


 The worst part of my illness was when my tonsils became red and swollen. I felt terrible throat pains, headaches, and pains in my ears and neck. Then, my tonsils became covered by white pus-filled spots. It made me feel very tired, lazy and weak, which made me sleep all day.

Also, the next week, when my mom checked my temperature, she noticed that my fever was going away and coming back in the next hours, which made me feel really cold and tremble. My fever would get higher throughout the nights and I barely got any sleep.

 Also, my strep throat made me feel terrible pain. My mom made me lots of cups of warm tea and bowls of chicken soup, but it was hard for me to drink and eat any sort of food. Swollen glands in the neck changed my voice and it was difficult for me to talk. I felt like something was stuck in my throat and in addition to that I also had bad breath.

 When the doctor came over, she told me that I was ill with a strep throat, which in my case was caused by a bacterium belonging to the group A streptococcus. To reduce my discomfort, the doctor recommended me to take antibiotics, which are pain relief and fever reducing medications at least once a day. Also my doctor told me I can get my voice back by gargling my mouth with warm salt water and drinks more fluid drinks.

 It took me another week to fully recover from this illness. I was excited to return to my school, and see everyone, because I have stayed home for three weeks and missed lots of schoolwork and tests.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Nataliya,

    My throat hurst just reading this! I like how you described so many senses here -- sights, feelings, temperature, taste, smell. I feel like I can really visualize your illness!

    To go even deeper with descriptive detail, I would suggest trying to add a metaphor or two. Hector used a lot of metaphors in his essay, so if you are having trouble coming up with one, you could start by reading over his.

    A quick grammar tip: change "have" to "had" in the very last sentence because you should use the past perfect to relate one past event to another.

    You have done a great job of guiding the reader through the essay with your topic sentences. Nice work!

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